i haven't posted in a while
so much has happened
so much good and
so much whatever

i don't really know where to begin
the introspection that used to plague (or bless) my subconscious
seems to have taken a long holiday and
i guess it's there it'll stay

instead i rush around thinking of the here and now
caught spinning and turning
dancing the Pidikhtos, circular
directional but never really going anywhere

and i guess that's where i am now
lost and not really able to express my thoughts
and i truly ask myself if i'll ever be able to again

i reread a lot of my blog and the posts and realized
that i have a way with words
and perhaps it's just me and it's my own
validation because i expressed feelings i can related to

but if i express feelings i understand
then maybe someone else also relates

maybe that's the thing with writing
why some authors just get it.
you read and you relate intimately for no
justifiable or tangible reason

in my case it's easy, i wrote them
but i sometimes give this blog to friends
as a way to say 'this is how i really am'
because to me it so perfectly paints the details
that make up who i am

but really it can be reduced to a few short lines
that don't rhyme or really have any rhythm to them
that are read more out of pity rather than conception